Amuse-Biatch Remembers Mama (Or, Rather, Mama Remembers Amuse-Biatch)

You know, possums, if blogs were like children, Child Protective Services would already have stepped in and taken Amuse-Biatch and Pink Navy away from us after finding them unfed, untended, and sitting in their own waste for weeks on end. No doubt we would be up on charges of abandonment, child endangerment and criminal neglect, among other things.

A fortunate thing, then, that blogs are not like children, and that we will never reproduce. (One of each of us in the world is quite enough, thank you; we came from the mother of all genetic sample sales. Can you just imagine a passel of mini-Charluses and mini-Xaxas who would make Stewie Griffin look like Baby Jesus? Even we shudder at the thought.)

At any rate, possums, we are back and ready to clasp our neglected children to our ample, empty bosoms. You needn’t be burdened with the tedious details of our absence (we chafe at how inapt and inept it is to call non-blogging, working life “real life,” to which Miss Xaxa says, “Spoken like a true basement-dweller!”). All you need to know is that we are back.

And, it seems, we picked rather a good time to remember our parental responsibilities. The Gals have scored quite a coup by getting Marcel Vigneron himself to participate in a live online chat tomorrow, Monday, May 7, at 7 p.m. Pacific time. We are pleased as punch to be part of it, however undeservedly, and will post further details as soon as they are made available to us.

As for the rest of it, please feel free to suggest topics, send tips, ask questions, etc., for this blog. Otherwise we may be reduced to discussing Giada de Laurentiis’ cleavage. Think of it as skeet shooting (“Are you sure you should attempt a sports metaphor?” asks Miss Xaxa nervously). The guns are loaded; we just need the clay pigeons.

We can’t wait to hear from you, possums. Cold and distant Mummy and Daddy are home and mixing the martinis.