Monday, February 04, 2008

Amuse-Biatch Crawls Out of Its Hole, Fails to See Shadow; Six More Weeks of Bitchery Predicted

Mind you, possums, if we failed to see our shadow, it's because we have none. Not that any of you who have a smattering of occult lore wouldn't have figured as much: no soul, no shadow.

And so we're back from outer space--

"Damn!" interrupted Miss XaXa. "Does it have to be so gay right off the bat?"

But you know us, possums: always a song in our desiccated little hearts.

We sure hate to walk in and find you here with that sad look upon your faces, and we wouldn't blame you if you'd changed your snarky, overeducated locks, but we swear we had a very good reason for being away for so long, about which we'll say more in the coming days.

And yes, March 12, 2008: the 70th anniversary of the Anschlu├č that drove Julie Andrews and Christopher Plummer out of Austria, and the premiere of Top Chef: Chicago. We'll be there with edelweiss and bells on.


Anonymous said...

With a heavy sigh, the faithful possum checks in at Amuse-Biatch... All winter long, there has been no sign of Charlus or Miss XaXa to be found, even at Pink Navy.
The bewildered possum wonders if they went into deep hibernation... Will they ever return?
"THIS time will be different," she assures herself... and lo, what to her wondering eyes should appear, but signs of new life on Amuse-Biatch!
"Yeeee-haw!!!" she exults, before remembering that was how Howard Dean imploded four years ago. Regaining her composure, the possum cannot help but feel a song coming on: "The hills are alive with the sound of Amuuuuse-Biatch..."

And all is well with the world again. Welcome back, Charlus & Miss XaXa! You've been sorely missed.

Possum 96819

Anonymous said...

Can't wait for more biatchy amuse-ment as they do season 4. Looks like they raided a big chunk of the San Francisco young chef market to populate the cast.

But Pink Navy is a real hot. I should add that to my RSS feed.

eric3000 said...

Welcome back!

Fat Cat said...

Now all really is right with the world. With deepening depression, each week I checked Pink Navy and Amuse Biatch for signs of life. I Googled you. Sick at heart, I even read obit columns, but nowhere could I find any hint for the reasons of the passing of my favorite blogging duo. And this season of Project Runway was so ripe for a little Pink Navy plucking.

Thank God and all that is, let me rephrase that. That God you're back to heap contumely upon those who so richly deserve it. Maybe I can even go off my medication now.

Planet Fat Cat

nona said...

Oh, Charlus, I'm so glad you're back. I look forward to your comments at least as much as I do the new season of Top Chef. All of us should be accorded a free pass when we need one, and I for one, am glad to see you back.

hughman said...

only 13 more shopping days left!!!! can't wait to see you mix it up again!!