Thursday, December 07, 2006

Elia Aboumrad Bikini Shot. No, Really and Truly This Time

Well, not quite. But almost. Come on, Mr. Google Perv, we're really doing our best for you here. We got her to the ocean, we got her to remove her chef's whites, and we even got her in the water. Maybe next time.

Really, you musn't be ungrateful. There was even that bonus performance of the newly discovered, long-feared-lost Martha Graham work, She Sells Sexual Harassment by the Seashore from a Sexually Ambiguous, Possibly Lycanthropic Fop.

In the meantime, Mr. Google Perv, feast your eyes on this: Miss Elia Aboumrad doing yoga, and demonstrating the pose known either as the Upward Dog or the Where-the-Sun-Don't-Shine Salutation. Note her perfectly manicured toenails, the just-so shade of nail polish (is it cranberry? Bordeaux? carmine?).

And the toe ring! As alluring, as erotic, as charged with wanton, sensual import as the anklet Barbara Stanwyck sported in Double Indemnity, or, better still, the pseudo-anklet Audrey Hepburn sported in Love in the Afternoon. We hope, Mr. Google Perv, that it will drive you, just as it did Gary Cooper, mad with jealousy and desire.

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