As you know, possums, we have been spending some time of late at the Rainbow Springs Gayhab, and it was with some excitement that we looked at our correspondence over the weekend, eager to have news and support from the outside world.
Instead, we found this letter from a longtime fan, who writes to us periodically:
Just wondering if anyone told you today that you have no talent. If not, let me be the first.
Come on losers...how about some personal information? Maybe something like who you write for. Oh, that's right. You can't get a paying gig. That's ok. Just keep trashing people in anonymity and continue to live in obscurity. I think that's best for everyone concerned.
Have a spiteful day!
In addition to this fine and cheering note written from firstname.lastname@example.org, our ironically anonymous fan also left this comment:
The "authors" of this site are perfect representations of the little kids who got picked on who grow up with chips on their shoulders, lashing out at anyone more skilled, successful or recognizable than they are.
My assumption is that after being rejected by legitimate media sources, they instead chose the anonymity of a blog to spit their venom. And such arrogance!
At least we can rest easier knowing their audience is so small to render their diatribes harmless. Except of course to those they are harming with their words. No matter how thick a person's skin is, no one likes to feel hated. Although something tells me these insignificant "writers" would rather by hated than ignored.
Well no more hate for me...it's time to ignore. Maybe they'll go away and leave the writing to real professionals.
Now, possums, our old, unenlightened selves would have focussed on the grammatical and typographical errors, and speculated about the identity of this anonymous fan who puts so much stock in "real professionals" writing and who once signed herself, "Mom."
But not our new selves. No, sirree. Frightened by the possibility that anonymous fans such as this one might indeed ignore us, we looked deep within our hearts and realized this fan might just have a point. Accordingly, we have resolved to have a whole week of what, if memory serves, Audrey Hepburn referred to as "sweetness and light" in Roman Holiday. All week long, we will say only nice, positive, completely heterosexual things. From now on, we are all kittens and goodness. Cross our newly lightened hearts.