Monday, March 05, 2007

Katie Lee Joel Heats Up the Purple Carpet in Oven Bag

Possums, we looked at this photograph of Top Chef's Season 1 hostess, Katie Lee Joel, taken at the recent Food Network Awards, and we shook our heads in pity.

Well, before the pity came the hunger. When we buy carnitas, the nice butcher chap gives them to us in the exact same bag that Katie Lee is wearing, and looking at her made us long for pork.

At any rate, Katie Lee, possum, it's a nice try, but don't you think it's a case of "too little, too late"? (Actually, Miss XaXa suggested that it was a case of taking a tinfoil hat to the next level, an entire tinfoil collection.)

Sure, you saw Padma Lakshmi become more popular (or talked about, which is all that matters) than you on the second season of Top Chef. You said to yourself, "What does she have that I don't?" As Yul Brynner used to talk-sing in The King and I, puzzlement.

After all, both you and Padma have the affectless delivery and slightly glazed look down pat (as well as youth and rich, pudgy, more famous husbands). You rightfully concluded, then, that Padma's whorendous, fugly outfits gave her the edge, and you decided to campaign for your old job back.

Sorry, possum, you're going to have to do better than that outfit which is both oven bag and turkey. The wrinkling is a nice touch (makes us think of the crumpled wrappers on those hot dogs you get outside Costco), but you're going to have to do a lot more to get into the Padma league. Better luck next time.

P.S. The whole Baby Spice/Katie Holmes look is also worrying us. Call us; we can help.


The Big Shamu said...

Why is she wearing a hefty cinch sack?

Anonymous said...

She looks like a half-popped Jiffy-Pop.

Anonymous said...

I have no fashion sense and yet even I would know enough not to wear that ugly get-up. Sad.

I love Charlus's take on it--Katie Lee competing with Padma to regain her hosting position back by resorting to wearing 'whorendous' outfits. He's too funny.

Anonymous said...

and the cloddy shoes??? FUGLY!