Mirror, Mirror on the Wall, Who's the Gayest of Them All?: Str8tacting Dale Levitski Risks Making Queen Bees Stinging Mad

Well, possums, we've found another in-depth interview with Chicago's own Dale Levitski, this time on Chicagoist.

But we think Dale had better watch his back the next time he wanders Halsted, or he'll get worse than a dunking. He might just get clocked with a ruby slipper for this:

C: Did you see what Gawker said about you?
DL: Yeah, they called me "the villain of Top Chef!"
C: They said, "Dale embodies the most offensively bland stereotype of homosexuality on television. And as opposed to offensively bland stereotypes embodied by characters like Will from Will and Grace, he actually exists."
...
DL: Which is so bizarre to me! Have you seen these queeny people on TV? I get emails every day from people around the country thanking me for not being the stereotype.
C: Well, it's just so hard to actually imagine you as that stereotype when you seem to be anything but.
DL: I'll definitely have my little quips here and there, but I'd definitely not say I'm a stereotypical gay guy at all.

If an effigy sporting a mohawk and manpris, and with a scented candle in its mouth, is found in Chicago's Boys' Town, you'll know why.

Madge of Dishonor: Gay Cheftestant and Bisexual Villain Bitchslapped by Undercover Brother

Oh the homo-anity, possums!

As Andy Towle is reporting, on this week's episode the cheftestants had to deal with both an undercover blogger and an undercover brother.

Yes, possums, the pudgy queen who complained that Sara Mair's lamb tasted like metal and who euthanized a vanilla candle with a napkin on the floor is none other than Madonna's brother, Christopher Ciccone. Evidently, the awful doesn't fall far from the tree.

Not that we're complaining, mind you. If nothing else, this was a priceless exchange:

Man Living Perennially in Bitch-Goddess Sister's Shadow: If that's a vegetable medley, I'm a monkey.
Dale Levitski: I will let Miss Sara know.

It's like dialogue from a lost Samuel Beckett play, Waiting for Risotto, as rewritten by All About Eve-era Joseph L. Mankiewicz.

Our only disappointment? That the Ciccone monkey got nowhere near Hung Huynh's oft-invoked ape.

Shiso Fine?: West Babylon Chef Prepares to Face New York Times Nebuchadnezzar

In the latest installment of its weekly BruniBetting feature, Eater reminds us that it is white-knuckle time at 9 Jones St. in New York, site of Top Chef Harold Dieterle's restaurant, Perilla (the moniker is the English name for the Japanese herb shiso).

Frank Bruni, the notoriously prolix and toothsomely purple prose stylist who serves as the feared restaurant critic for the New York Times, will reveal tonight (in tomorrow's edition of the paper) just what he thinks of Perilla.

Since Bruni, gaypo di gaypi of the Gay & Foodie Mafias, can make or break a restaurant with a madcap, stylistically belabored critique, such reviews are anticipated and feared in equal measure. Eater is betting that the West Babylon, Long Island, top chef will get his coveted two stars from Bruni.

Alas, tomorrow night's special, momentum-interrupting, give-us-another-week-to-tweak-and-pump-up-the-remaining-episodes edition of "Watch What Happens," hosted by Raggaydy Andy, will not be live, and so we won't get to see Harold glowing or scowling (at least not about the review).