Friday, December 19, 2008

It’s a Hanukkah Miracle! Gail Simmons a Member of the Tribe!














Mazel tov, oh fortunate Jews of the world! Behold the Lioness of the tribe of Judah!

Of course it ought not have been a surprise that radiant, lissome, buxom, leonine, McGill summa cum laude graduate Gail Simmons should be the most alluring literary Jewess since the Biblical Esther, Rebecca in Walter Scott’s Ivanhoe and Rachel in Marcel Proust’s Remembrance of Things Past. Still, it’s nice to know.

It should have been Gail judging the Top Chef holiday episode (Michelle Bernstein is simply not an adequate replacement); on the other hand, given what an abomination the episode turned out to be, it was probably for the best that Gail not be tainted by it.

So, we didn’t get Gail in the holiday episode, but now we get to watch her make latkes, courtesy of WPIX. Enjoy, possums.

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

"Of course it ought not have been a surprise that radiant, lissome, buxom, leonine, McGill summa cum laude graduate Gail Simmons should be the most alluring literary Jewess since the Biblical Esther, Rebecca in Walter Scott’s Ivanhoe and Rachel in Marcel Proust’s Remembrance of Things Past. Still, it’s nice to know."

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA YOU ARE SO FUNNY AND VERY LITERARILY FUNNY AMUSE-BIATCH BOY I HAVE READ THEM ALL AND SO HAVE YOU AND THAT'S WHAT MAKES IT FUNNY CHARLUSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Anonymous said...

Oh, this makes me love her even more...if that's possible!?!

Anonymous said...

YES YES YES I AM RIGHT IT IS LIKE A TINY GAY BOOK CLUB AND YOU AND I ARE THE MEMBERS CHARLUSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Anonymous said...

Wow, for once there's a Jewish person on a reality show that I don't have to feel embarrassed about sharing a religion/ethnicity with. It really is a Hanukkah miracle!

Diana said...

THe picture of Gail making latkes...was that supposed to be video clip? Would you happen to know where I can find the clip? Purty please? I've been dying to find a good latke recipe and I'm sure Gail's is one of the best.

Anonymous said...

http://www.foodandwine.com/recipes/renees-latkes
Check our her recipe on Food and Wine online. They have dill and sound yummy!

Anonymous said...

As Fabio might ask: What is the difference between a Jewish woman and an Italian woman?
A: An Italian woman has fake diamonds and real orgasms....

Mazel Tov, indeed.

-Best, an Italian

Anonymous said...

Hope we get a "holiday" from Gail soon. I'm going to passo[ver] if I don't get a Ted or Tony break soon.

Anonymous said...

Actually, it would be a miracle if she wasn't Jewish, are you kidding me??? You have to be Jewish or be on the tribe's team to get an on camera gig.