Amuse-Biatch Photoessay: The Ravages of Time, Hormones and Sugar; the Persistent Doucheyness of Wallet Chains and Thumbs in Pockets

Ted Allen to Lisa Fernandes: Editing Is the Real Bitch; Lisa Fernandes (Not to Ted Allen): I’m Not Your Bitch, Bitch

Possums, we’re rather tickled to have stumbled upon this little clip, in which Lisa Fernandes plays television host at the Garden Party celebrating the 25th anniversary of the Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual & Transgender Community Center of New York City. She’s personable, she’s charming, she makes a lesbian joke, and fittingly enough, professes her love for the “I’m not your bitch, bitch” catchphrase. She also catches up with Raggaydy Andy Cohen and Season 4 guest judges April Bloomfield, Johny Iuzzini and Ted Allen.

Ted commiserates with her, telling her, “Editing is a bitch,” which Miss XaXa says is the most house-music-worthy declaration since “Rhythm is a dancer.” And most interestingly, Ted tells us in no uncertain terms that he feels he is “a pawn in the hands of [Bravo’s] editors,” and that he is glad to be working on his new Food Detectives show, where he won’t be subject to such editing.

Amuse-Biatch Photoessay: Say One, Two Prinzes Kneel Before You (That's What We Said Now)

The Biest Comes Out, and It's a Beaut

Possums, we were fans of Jennifer Biesty because of her general air of solidity and maturity, both in cooking and in temperament. However, we have just been reminded that not for nothing is her nickname "The Beast," and not for nothing does she have a shark's fin atop her head.

In her exit interview with our pals at Grub Street, she kicks a trashcan or two:

Did the judges make a mistake [Wednesday] night?
I really thought — especially with how [the judges] were talking about the Polish-sausage dish — that there was no way that we would go home, or I would go home. So their mistake? I don’t know — they make a lot.

...

What was your impression of guest judge Johnny Iuzzini?
He was kind of pompous and arrogant, really working the camera. Out of all the judges so far, he was the most disingenuous. He was really there more to get his face on TV than to actually be a judge.

...

In terms of the hairstyle, who pulls it off better: you or Richard?
Me. You can tell the difference between a $20 haircut and an $80 haircut.

What did we tell you, possums? Never piss off a lesbian. Still, we wonder: Can Richard fight a fauxhawk war on two fronts?

Amuse-Biatch Photoessay: It Seems Like Only Last Week Padma Lakshmi Was Standing Next to a Boyish Guest Judge in Jeans, T-Shirt and Chain-Wallet

Johnny Iuzzini: Metrosexual Avenger or Avenger of Metrosexuals?

Looking through the Bravo photo album for this episode, we came across these pictures of guest judge Johnny Iuzzini (and kudos to Bravo for fixing the spelling of his and his restaurant’s names so quickly, though it might be churlish of us to point out that the name of the restaurant, Jean Georges, does not have a hyphen), wearing two different shirts for the Quickfire Challenge, one of which did not make it on the air. How very metrosexual. What gives?

Spelling Bee-atch: Is Bravo So Distracted by “Gorges” Guest Judge’s Looks That It Can’t Spell His Name Right (Either of Them)?

Possums, that's a screencap of the preview for this week's episode, featuring as guest judge the renowned pastry chef Johnny Iuzzini.

You'll notice that's Johnny with two n's and Iuzzini with two z's and one n.

So let's see, Bravo. The man is the executive pastry chef for Jean-Georges Vongerichten's three Michelin-starred restaurant, Jean Georges, was named Outstanding Pastry Chef of the Year in 2006 by the James Beard Foundation, and last year was named by Forbes.com as one of the 10 most influential chefs working in America today, and you can't even get his bloomin' name right? And, as possum Lilly points out, Bravo can't get the name of his restaurant right either. Good work all around!